so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
