apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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