i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
