Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
