someone get that fucking seahorse.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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