Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Randomize