I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
When are your genitals available?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
