BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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