Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
