I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
