We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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