I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Can I color on your dick again?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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