Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize