my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize