We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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