Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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