who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize