I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I forgot how hot balto sounded
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
