this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
