fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
