You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
The struggles of a small town man whore
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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