i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
you inspire me to be a worse person
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I need to align my fucking chakras
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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