with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
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