All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
