I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
