I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
