My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
