Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
