I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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