What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
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