So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Randomize
