me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
