how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
