My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
