so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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