Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
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he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
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He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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