too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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