Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
