whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Less talking, more tequila
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize