who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize