I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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