hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
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