Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Randomize
