I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
