O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
