fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
