he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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