Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
