you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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