At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Randomize
